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Aug 25
2025
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Helen Whitten
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I was recently summoned for jury service. Despite my age, it was the first time I had been called and, once there, I was randomly chosen by the computer to sit on two cases. It was an eye-opening experience in many ways, and a huge responsibility to have another person’s future in one’s hands. I am glad to say that every person on the jury with me took this responsibility very seriously and the conversation in the deliberating room was respectful and constructive.
I read this week that Stephen Lambert of Studio Lambert, the producer of The Traitors TV series, has said that making the programme has somewhat shaken his faith in the jury system, as contestants are so bad at spotting a lie. I can understand his comment, having watched a few episodes of his series, but of course the process of The Traitors is very different to a jury attending a court case where witnesses, the police, barristers, claimant and accused all provide evidence with the aim of helping rather than hindering the jury in making their decision. However, I did feel that there was one ingredient to success that was potentially missing from both scenarios: a facilitator.
Yes, there is a foreman of a jury, but they are not necessarily trained to chair a group or facilitate a conversation towards an end result. And yes, Claudia Winkleman acts as a sort of facilitator in The Traitors but her main role is to make the programme dramatic, not necessarily to encourage a search for truth, as the lack of truth, and the inability of contestants to spot the liars, is where the drama lies in that series.
The definition of a facilitator, just for clarification, is “a neutral guide who helps a group work together effectively to achieve a common goal by managing the process and dynamics of a meeting or event. They focus on ‘how’ the group works rather than ‘what’ the group discusses, using structured activities and processes to ensure open dialogue, balanced participation, and successful decision-making, without taking sides or contributing to the content.” I would add that it can combine the how and the what and also involves generating a safe space for people to talk and share opinions in a respectful and focused manner.
Generally speaking, a facilitator should, indeed, adopt an objective, neutral role within the group. Of course this is difficult, in fact impossible, in the jury system as it is made up of all twelve jurors who each have to be party to the final decision on a verdict. However, it is possible to lead a group discussion in a neutral way and share one’s views as that discussion unfolds.
None of this is particularly easy in a group who have never met before and may have very different personalities and backgrounds. It would, in my opinion, therefore, be helpful to provide the foreman, or foreperson, whether nominated by the Judge in Court or by the other jury members, with a one-page document outlining the role in more detail. This would include not just advising them that it will be up to them to inform the Court of whether the verdict is guilty or not guilty, but also to supervise the group to ensure that only facts shared in court are discussed. They must prevent people researching or applying any additional information they might have read but that was not mentioned in the trial. Also their role is to remind the group that they should only discuss the trial when all twelve of them are together in the deliberating room and not at any other time, and particularly not in a public arena. Some tips on how to manage all this, ensure that people keep on track, and don’t interrupt or dominate others etc, would surely be useful.
As a trained mediator and facilitator, I have had my share of challenges with groups here and in other countries. Some people can try to take over, others can be passive aggressive, others argumentative and so forth. I firmly believe that being given some tips and guidance on the role could certainly help a novice foreman to feel confident and aware that they have the authority to call a halt to a discussion should everyone speak at once, or if one person is bullying another into their opinion. Also to encourage those who are introvert, or unused to speaking up in a group, or those who are daunted by the responsibility placed on them. The aim is to ensure justice is done.
Both functional and dysfunctional dynamics of jury deliberation can be seen played out in Channel 4’s documentary The Jury: Murder Trial where two juries judge the same case. It’s quite interesting to watch.
The comment by The Traitors’ producer inspired some conversation on Times Radio the other morning, where a commentator suggested that perhaps only “intelligent” people should be called for jury service. Not only is this a tricky measure but intelligent people can sometimes be totally lacking in common sense if they are in their ivory tower of intellect and reason and be unable to ‘see’ what others can see in the evidence. So that didn’t seem like a sensible idea to me.
Other commentators are advocating that cases should be overseen simply by members of the legal profession but, from my experience, it was in the diversity of life experience in the jury group in which the power lay. Each person in that deliberating room brought unique insight, knowledge or perspective to the case, which helped to broaden each person’s understanding. It was invaluable to have that diversity of information available in the room to help us reach our verdict. I felt fortunate in my fellow jury members, as each one listened and thought deeply about the case before us. I was impressed with the whole process.
I was less impressed in the way the police had collected or had not collected evidence in both the trials on which I was a juror and that was disappointing for everyone. One cannot convict without evidence. Again, this is an area where the foreman as facilitator can keep the group on track, ensuring that the decision is based on what is credible, consistent and beyond reasonable doubt.
So, I would disagree with the producer of The Traitors but would advocate for more advice on the role of the foreman, to empower them successfully to facilitate the discussion.
And, as a postscript, the role of mediation, or lack of it, is something that has concerned me as much in politics as in the Courtroom. I watched Trump and Putin sitting, six opinionated men in a room, and I questioned whether there was an objective and trained mediator present to ensure the discussion was balanced, that all voices were heard and that participants did not veer off onto pointless tangents or unconstructive bullying. In my opinion, without such a person conducting the discussion, a meaningful agreement is less likely to be reached.
Watching the Channel 4 The Jury: Murder Trial programme demonstrates even more the need for a good facilitator to manage the conversations. No Foreman has been allocated and the jury are allowed to be together in a room sharing their opinions before all the evidence has been heard, which is not how it usually is. This is a dramatised programme, where people have volunteered to come onto the programme – perhaps a desire to be on tv, who knows. But it doesn’t really represent the jury experience in any way that was my own experience. The programme is, like The Traitors, all about television drama and not really about the legal process.
Aug 07
2025
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Helen Whitten
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This week we have read about how one in ten businesses have seen staff quit over office working demands, particularly the suggestion that they should come to the office rather than work from home. We have also read about how the sickness rates of civil servants are rocketing due to “being forced back into the office”. This has resulted in the civil service losing more than four million working days to staff sickness a year, with absence rates rising by more than ten per cent a year in some departments. And, of course, we already know that vast numbers of the population are out of work due to mental and other illnesses.
While obviously there is genuine sickness and disturbance for some within these numbers, I really question whether such decisions by employees are not simply handing an invitation on a plate to those organisations to replace them with AI. On the one hand everyone is terrified, it seems, of being made obsolete by AI but on the other they are not interested in showing their value in the workplace as living breathing human beings. They are choosing to disappear behind a screen, which is probably the closest they can get to being robotic.
I was vice chair of the Work-Life Balance Trust back in the early 2000s, so I am very much in favour of flexible and hybrid working, job shares and part-time arrangements, but I am not in favour of working from home five days a week. As I have written before, I do not see how the experienced workers can possibly pass on as much of their expertise in narrow-focused Zoom calls, with workers often far away, nor can I see how people working from home can come to have anything like the broad understanding of an organisation that someone working in the office will accumulate.
Earlier this week I was speaking to someone who had been senior in a business, let’s call her Sally. She mentioned to me a moment where she saw a younger member of staff remain silent as she drew a meeting to a close. When she had asked the group if everyone had understood the project plan, they all answered in the affirmative, including him. However, Sally intuited by his body language that he had not, and made a point of quietly going up to him after the meeting had finished and checking if there were gaps in his understanding. There were, and she was able to explain the plan further to him so that he fully grasped his role in the team.
Translate this to a Zoom meeting. Would Sally have been able to intuit that body language, that problem? I argue that it is less likely that that she would have been able to identify such a problem on screen. It is hard to gauge someone’s expression, emotions or body language in a Zoom or Teams call where all you see is head and shoulders. Depending on the number of people on a call it is often near impossible to see people’s eyes in detail, so unlikely that you might ‘catch the eye’ of someone who agrees or disagrees with you on a point, or who potentially believes that the person speaking is bullsh*tting, whether they understand something, or whether another person on the call might be a mentor or ally.
In the workplace, yes, there is distraction and some of that can be time-wasting. However, you will inevitably get a broader understanding and overview of the organisation for being physically present. Simply by walking around a building, listening to conversations at the coffee machine or in the lift, you will brush up against people in different departments and roles who, in the small-focused targeted milieu of a Zoom call will not be there. You will overhear phone calls to clients, hear a manager give direction to their direct reports, hear two colleagues problem-solve an issue that is not in your remit but might be interesting. Sitting alone somewhere will not give you these opportunities. And AI, as it exists at the moment, is not privy to picking up all those random conversations and clues in lifts or corridors!
If humans are not valuing and actively demonstrating what they specifically bring to a workforce – creativity, intuition, warmth, wit, compassion, challenge, diverse ideas and opinions, collaboration, a collegiate approach, charisma, leadership, expertise, skill, experience, wisdom, emotional intelligence and far more – then why wouldn’t that organisation choose to go down the route of AI? So much less problem, less sickness, less “quiet quitting”, less truculence. Look at driverless trains – no strikes, no problems. Surely there will be a renewed incentive to replace civil servants with AI if those civil servants are always ill? (Statistics show that people in the private sector or who run their own businesses, and therefore have less of a financial safety blanket, are considerably less likely to be ill.) Surely there will be renewed incentive to replace those employees who demand to work from home five days a week with AI if they are not demonstrating to their bosses how much more they bring to the workplace if they are there in person, not necessarily every day but most days?
I really fear that there will be a competency dip in years to come as those who work from home come to realise that they do not fully understand how the business actually works as a whole. Today’s means of communicating – mobiles, emails, Teams calls etc – are so narrow, so focused. There is none of the randomness of answering a colleague’s landline ringing on a nearby desk and being asked a question or being asked to take down a message that might give you some insight into an area of the business that you had not thought about previously. In addition to this, in picking up a call for a colleague or a boss, you have spoken to someone you might not have spoken to had you not had that random opportunity, and this could lead to expanding your network.
Yes, AI can be brilliant and do some of the work, without doubt, and be brilliant in the right place and right time. Flexible working is supportive of productivity as it allows someone to address a personal issue that they might otherwise be sitting at a desk fretting about. Indeed, Zoom and Teams are the answer to some meetings, but, in general, technology brings oh so much less to the party in the long run. Of course we make mistakes, have blind spots, are biased, yet isn’t it more likely that these issues will be challenged more forcefully within a group setting, where the nuances of a situation can be explored in more depth, than sitting on our own?
Human beings have created a multitude of ideas, innovations, solutions, machines, beautiful buildings, innovative tech and more. It makes me wonder whether the Industrial Revolution would have happened had those men not been in a room together. For collaboration in person is energising – working in a team in a room brings both focus but also laughter and, if someone has some problems in their lives, at home or work, this is more likely to be picked up by the human skill of ‘reading’ their body language and, as Sally did in the example above, taking the time to find out what the problem might be, human to human, before it negatively impacts performance.
Each one of us is unique. Each one of us has unique perspectives and ideas to bring to an organisation. How much harder to bring those ideas to fruition if you are isolated. How much harder to ask for help on a tech-based call than it might be to quietly ask a person you pass in the corridor whom you know has worked on that type of project or issue before.
If people don’t want to be replaced by AI, then turn up and demonstrate your human value, skills, talent, experience and emotional intelligence to those around you. Enjoy sharing your knowledge with others and learning from others. Use AI as a tool but, as I see it, it doesn’t make sense to give your organisation the excuse to replace you with technology just because you are absent or too much trouble to manage.
Jul 16
2025
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Helen Whitten
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I read recently that schools are having to accommodate children in multiple different rooms in order to complete their exams because these children have a fear of being in a large exam room with other children. This is cumbersome in so many ways – separate invigilators, finding sufficient rooms for the number of students, etc. It must be expensive and complicated to organise, but does it actually help each student to acclimatize themselves to the rigours of life which will inevitably, at some stage and in some situation, make them feel uncomfortable and anxious? Obviously, there are special cases, but the numbers involved seem to suggest this is becoming the norm and I question how helpful it is in building their resilience in the long term.
When I was training in Cognitive-Behavioural Coaching we were trained in the method of Exposure Theory – eg that if you expose yourself to the thing you are frightened of, step by step your anxiety will reduce as the situation becomes normalised. For example, if someone has a fear of lifts they are encouraged to just step into a lift for a short time, then gradually for a longer time and then take it to the first floor and prove to themselves that they can manage it, however difficult it is. Nothing catastrophic happens to them and they are taught to maintain a calming thought to support their action. As Shakespeare said, “there is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so”. Eventually they will be able to go to the 20th floor, or wherever they need to end up. It may never be their favourite activity, but they can manage it.
Many of us have experienced the fear of giving our first presentation to a group. I can certainly remember this vividly when I was doing my Postgraduate Diploma in Personnel Management at Thames Valley University. We had to present an aspect of a report to our group. I was 42 years old but had never stood up in front of people before and was terrified. It went ok. Not brilliant but I didn’t fluff too many lines and got reasonable feedback. Bit by bit I developed some confidence and, with the inevitable ups and downs of some sessions going better than others, I was able to convince myself to carry on to the next presentation, and so on. In the end, as many of you know, I ran my business, Positiveworks, and stood up facilitating training sessions to senior executives and others around the world – and loved it.
By accommodating the pupils’ anxieties regarding exams, the schools are not enabling this kind of exposure theory, or habituation, to work to normalise a situation that the majority of us find frightening. And yet, as the years go by we get used to it as we have to go on to A levels, university, college or professional qualifications. Most of the time we don’t enjoy taking exams, or taking them in a large room full of other people, but, like so many challenges we face in life, we do gradually get used to it and try to make the best of it. Some will deal with it better than others and that is life. What one person thrives at another may not, and vice versa. Such is the wonderful diversity of the world.
I have written about the absolute logic of being socially anxious when we are young. We have not been in a multitude of situations, nor had to interact with people outside our family, friends or school. Meeting new people outside of these circles is bound to be frightening, and many of us continue to have anxiety of networking at conferences or entering a friend’s party on one’s own well into adult life. I for one can certainly relate to this. The important thing is to silence the doubtful or catastrophising mind that says “I can’t stand it” or “everything will go wrong” or “I can’t think in this situation” or “the lift is going to plummet to the ground and I’ll die” or whatever. We can train our mind to override our unhelpful or irrational thoughts and fears to support our emotional ability to undertake whatever activity we face. We may not wish to do any of these things but we may be obliged to do so and, particularly when we can understand the benefit, we have to push through. We can build thoughts that support constructive emotions and behaviours – “I’d rather I was confident in this situation but I can manage it anyway” or “I’d rather I was taking an exam in a private room but I can manage it anyway and do my best”.
I believe it is essential also to expose children and young adults to views that differ from their own and encourage them to be curious about those views rather than choosing to be offended by them. We seem to be entering a parallel universe of the law where one person’s subjective ‘offence’ ends up with another person losing their job, their reputation and even ending up behind bars. (I am not talking here about inciting hatred or violence, which certainly is protected by the law, but merely about having an opposing viewpoint.) The tendency to label another person as ‘wrong’ or intending harm for offering another or opposite opinion to their own is limiting conversation and certainly limiting creativity. So many innovations have been arrived at by someone seeing something in a completely new and different way to the norm. If the younger generations do not feel able to express an idea or opinion for fear of criticism or worse, then problem-solving capabilities are reduced. People are talking about diversity being such a great thing but are, by silencing diversity of opinion, effectively stifling creative brainstorming.
Teaching the process of debate could ease this problem – where a student has to argue a point from all angles. This can often lead to a greater understanding of all the subtleties and issues within a situation or problem. It pushes our thinking beyond the norm and makes us do something we are uncomfortable with in the process.
AI has given me this definition of Exposure Therapy: “Exposure therapy is designed to help individuals confront their fears and reduce anxiety by gradually exposing them to feared situations, objects, or memories in a safe and controlled environment. It aims to break the cycle of avoidance that often perpetuates anxiety disorders.” I am pretty happy with this explanation and I suspect every one of us reading this has been in a position where we felt nervous the first time we did something – whether it is taking an exam, making a presentation, driving a car or whatever – and yet each time we repeated that activity we acclimatised ourselves to it. It became normal as our brain’s pathways learnt to manage the situation or skill and in this the mind reassured the emotion that we could push through and learn to be more comfortable within the situation.
I don’t think we are doing young people any favours by ensuring that they always feel ‘comfortable’ or by over-protecting them. Of course, there will be exceptional circumstances where this is necessary but reading about the numbers involved in schools it is hard to accept that all those require or would benefit from special attention.
Life is tough. Here I am in my seventies and still facing new situations and challenges. Even now I have to talk myself through to the “I can do this” position. Let’s help students build that resilience for life too.
For further reading on this subject:
Cognitive-Behavioural Coaching Techniques for Dummies by Helen Whitten
Jul 07
2025
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Helen Whitten
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I’m reaching that age where friends and family are getting sick and dying. Illness can come upon us very suddenly, unbidden and with no forewarning. The words spoken at the ever-increasing number of memorial services I am attending are food for thought, and all this is a chilling reminder that none of us is immortal, and our day will come.
My mother used to say to me, aged 81, “I feel so young inside”. This is a common feeling among us all as we get older. The body fades but the spirit doesn’t have to.
“It’s just a number,” people say as another birthday is celebrated. To some extent that is true, yet it is a number that is taking us each day closer to our ending. And that is a salutary thought. For it brings home to us the question of how we are going to spend these next years on this earth, and it also draws us into reflecting on how we have lived the previous years. What we can be proud of, what we regret, what we choose not to repeat.
None of us is perfect and my Mum requested that we not paint her as such when it came to the eulogy at her own funeral. “I’ve listened to too many descriptions of ‘angels’ who were far from it!” she told me. And so we did indeed mention a few of her ‘quirks’ at her funeral because they were a part of her and we loved her as she was, for her humanity, not in some imagined perfection.
So I am going to share the lessons I have learnt from life and the poignant words I have heard at memorials I have attended over recent years:
- Stop, reflect and think about the legacy you wish to leave behind. Life is busy when we’re young and yet taking a moment, and sometimes that is all it takes, to consider the actions and behaviours that will leave a legacy of how you wish to be remembered by family and friends can help you live life today. Training workshops occasionally used to ask participants to write down the words they would like people to say at their funeral, but this can push the question too far into the distance really, especially when you are young. Perhaps better to imagine what you would like people – partners, children, parents, colleagues, clients, friends (for you are tad different with each person with whom you interact) – to say about you at your birthday next year? And then, if you would like them to use those words, stop and identify what actions it requires that you take in order to inspire such comments.
- Show your love. “All we are is how we make people feel,” was a phrase I took away from a recent memorial and it became clear that this person had been very generous with his love, both to family and to friends. A recent research study showed that it is often the small things we do for others that demonstrates our love – it doesn’t have to be big gestures, or flowers, or holidays in exotic places. It can be as simple as making cup of tea, rubbing an aching back, phoning to have a chat, giving a hug, offering a G&T! The love shown in small things. Letting go of bitterness and resentment for what has gone before also clears the energy we bring into a room. How much happier we can be if we learn the lesson and then focus on more positive and constructive things rather than dwelling on the past. How much happier it is to be around someone who brings a loving energy into a room.
- Enjoy each day, each moment. This can be a decision we make. It doesn’t mean to say we can’t acknowledge that we feel sad or angry or tired but we can allow ourselves to try to find things to enjoy each day despite that. Reading about anyone who has had a serious illness, accident or traumatic event in their life, there is a repeated sense that this enables them to look for and enjoy what life has to bring and see each day as a blessing.
- Realize that family life is precious but complex and goes through many iterations. I remember imagining that once one hit adulthood one had life sussed, that one could put away study and didn’t have anything more to learn. How stupid and naïve I was! Here I am still learning, still growing, still making endless mistakes and learning more. Family life is always changing. Each person within it is going through endless stages of development and transition and each person is an individual who often needs a different approach to others. As one stage gives way to the next every member of the family is having to reconsider who they are, what they care about, what they choose to give attention to, how they need to behave in order to reflect their values. All parents make mistakes but if our children feel loved, and that we are there for them, then hopefully they will forgive us our humanity and fallibility. As my 9-year-old grandson said to me recently “Everyone makes mistakes. The important thing is to recognise and acknowledge them.” From the mouths of babes …
- Give your best at work. Many of us have some of our best moments at work, a sense of purpose, fulfilment, teamwork. It doesn’t have to be overwhelming but the concept of “quiet quitting” is anathema to me. We owe it to ourselves and those with and for whom we work to give it our best, whatever we do. We gain so much more if we do, and learn so much more in the process.
- Keep your passions and interests going. Life keeps moving on. I remember the holiday when my teenage sons came back from school. I had put the summer aside to be with them but they were off with their friends. It happens again when they finally leave home, the empty nest, then when they marry or find a partner. One makes a brief come-back in their lives if and when children arrive but once again when those children become teenage one is forced back onto one’s own path. It’s totally healthy and natural and yet can be challenging. So I have learnt that it is essential to keep one’s own career or interests, voluntary or paid, going so as not to feel too bereft when those stages occur for I think there were many of my mother’s generation, especially women who did not work, who had breakdowns when the children left home, for what was life all about after that. It doesn’t have to be like that now.
- Be generous of spirit, open to opportunity and to all the blessings life brings us. Old age can be quite a lonely time as one’s children are busy, just as we were at their age. We are so fortunate these days to have endless clubs, courses and classes open to us, as well as continuing to work or offering ourselves up for volunteering should we choose. The brain enjoys challenge and if we allow ourselves to get into too much of a rut of routine it will stagnate, so finding new things to interest us or maintaining those interests we enjoy, be it writing, painting, hiking, yoga or whatever, keeps us young. I remember my mother, aged 82, telling me “I’m just driving the old people down to the Autumn Club today, darling.” She didn’t include herself in that term ‘old people’ despite her age.
The words I have heard spoken at memorials are good reminders of how to live and shape a good life for ourselves. They shed a light on life itself and on how love, courage, appreciation of beauty, family, creativity and work help us to live our lives day to day and find meaning. Such words are inspired by actions of love and friendship and so one takes away from these occasions more than the memory of the person lost. One takes away an invitation to remember how sacred life is, day by ordinary day, and how there is beauty to be seen whenever we look for it.
Jun 12
2025
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Helen Whitten
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Two conflicting images have come my way recently. Firstly, with my book club I read a book called The Anomaly. It’s about a flight that takes place first in March and then in June. Exactly the same flight, same people, same pilot, lands again three months later. And so, once the US Government have fiddled about with logistics within a very unique situation, people start to meet their doppelganger – eg the March ones meet the June ones. One is looking and talking to oneself. Quite a weird thought. After all, I guess we often feel interested in how other people see us versus how we see ourselves and so this presents just that opportunity. But would one really want that? To meet oneself?
The second image came when we had a school reunion of Cranborne Chase, Class of 1967, and there was a friend I hadn’t seen for 58 years but enjoyed talking to. I was also flattered that she had brought a copy of my novel No Lemons in Moscow for me to sign for her. We shared experiences of the last years since we left school. And then a few days later she died. And so all of a sudden I was presented with another image – of not existing.
So those two strange images of firstly meeting myself and secondly non-existence made me horribly aware of both the strangeness and fragility of life and also of the limitations of one’s imagination.
There are many moments in life that are hard to imagine – one can never truly understand what it is to be a parent until one is one. One has these ludicrous ideas that it isn’t going to change one’s life, that one will be able to continue as a loving and functioning partner or spouse, carry on one’s work or career just as efficiently … and then one’s life is turned completely upside down by this demanding little creature that stimulates a love so strong that one could never have imagined it until it happened.
I think people who become ill with a life-threatening illness also meet a crossroads where their sense of self is turned upside down.
And all of this makes one wonder at life, wonder at what it means to be alive for these years one exists… and then doesn’t. And people talk of an afterlife but we have as yet been unable to prove that there is one. And so one bumbles along trying to make the most of it all, though as we get older and experience illness and death in those around us, we have to develop a resilience and an acceptance that it could be us next. This is the nature of life – looking forward to being grown up when we are children, being too busy to think whilst in middle life, and then longing for things to slow down as we live with that shadow hanging over us wondering ‘what is next’ and yet not being able to imagine it exactly.
One prepares for illness, a little, but one likes to imagine it won’t happen to oneself. One prepares for death but one really can’t imagine it other than wishing that it will be speedy and without pain.
Our minds are creative. They can imagine much but there are certain things that defy one and are, in truth, unimaginable. One is to meet oneself and the other is to be no more.
May 18
2025
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A friend and I were sharing our frustration at the way our beautiful city of London is becoming defaced by endless graffiti. We were travelling on the tube and passing by mile after mile of graffiti on walls, buildings and even private houses. It feels threatening and indeed probably is, as it is intended to be so. Much of it is a method of communicating the territorial areas of drug gangs.
How to manage not to feel utterly depressed about this, we asked ourselves? “Looking up,” my friend said to me, “has changed my perspective. Instead of getting depressed by the shabbiness of today’s Richmond I looked up one day and saw beautiful buildings and porticos, stained glass and statues, artwork and craftsmanship and suddenly I felt better.”
I know exactly what she means. It is too easy these days to get drawn down into the gutter rather than looking at the stars. Our news outlets headline all the ghastly tragedies and threats of our world. The television channels, streaming or terrestrial, show us all the darkest sides of human nature with violence and death. How I have been longing for something uplifting. Then I found it – rewatching the series Civilisation presented by Sir Kenneth Clark, which is, thank heaven, streaming on BBC iPlayer. I watched it with my parents, way back around 1970, and it was a weekly family ritual of appreciation of his knowledge, wisdom and perception and the incredible creativity of humankind.
Watching this series again has reminded me how important it is to seek the beauty in life and the beauty in human nature. In today’s world we get bombarded by misery and I have become increasingly aware of how the focus on wonder, art, beautiful music, craft and harmony is something we need to actively decide to focus on. We can’t be passive about this. It has to be a deliberate act and we may even need to plan it in our diaries in order to change habits and focus on what we personally find uplifting.
For it is such things that are indeed the ingredients of our civilisation. Watching Clark talk simply to camera about the beautiful artefacts he is discussing takes one into another world, out of the humdrum and into the transcendent. And it is all around us in this city as it is everywhere, and in nature. Even as I walk around Kew, I notice every Victorian terraced house has some beauty – maybe a stained-glass window, ceramic tiles around the front door, or intricate carving on a porch. In central London we have outstanding architecture, stunning churches and tranquil squares. Every city has something that has been crafted by human imagination and skill. We just have to remember to notice this!
This doesn’t take away completely my frustration at the way the graffiti is a reminder of the disrespect of our environment, nor that it must involve trespass and costs councils a fortune to clean it off, only for it to appear again the next night. And I wonder why it is that with so much CCTV these vandals can get away with it – for these are no Banksy-style artists. I still worry that there is a lack of respect for authority and basically far too many people, gangs and shoplifters, are sticking two fingers up at the police and politicians alike. But taking time out from all this refreshes mind, body and spirit.
So may I suggest you take a trip into the series Civilisation, or simply look up at the stars, or at what mankind has created with our endless ingenuity. Perhaps remind yourself of some exquisite music that lifts your spirit, visit a gallery or cathedral, or just sit quietly watching a sunset. There’s no need to do more than look and listen.
The philosophers of ancient times and the Renaissance knew that creating civilised individuals who contribute to the culture and society in which they live takes education. It seldom happens without a teacher or parent to open the eyes of a child to beauty, to open their ears to music and harmony, to demonstrate the art of civilised conversation and discussion, to develop good manners. I was shocked to read of secondary school pupils in Ipswich and beyond throwing scissors and chairs at their teachers, refusing to attend class and walking around in intimidating gangs. If young adults and children are left to learn how to behave by watching violent thrillers, tweeting, gaming or interacting on social media, it is not surprising that they are not learning these finer qualities of how we humans can interact with one another and the world in which we live. Who knows, there might be a Michelangelo, Mozart or Shakespeare among them if given the right inspiration.
I’m not pretending to have all this right myself – I get hooked into the negativity of the current state of our world and my surroundings like many of us do. But I just wanted to share how restorative I have found it to spend a few moments with Sir Kenneth Clark, to be reminded that we humans have created some extraordinarily beautiful works of art, music and craft and that our day is enhanced by noticing the beauty around us. Of course, we can’t do this unless we appreciate what there is that has been created, and value it. We have this amazing legacy that we can now access in person or online and I thank those who had the skill and talent to create these wonders, and the patrons who have made this possible. A world of beauty, buildings, music, art.
When life gets depressing, take a moment. Look up. Or find the series on iPlayer. We can still ask the police and politicians to act and yet know individually how to soothe our nerves, so it doesn’t all become too much!
